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Nixon
New Member


 United Kingdom
44 posts Joined: Feb, 2005
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Posted - 2005/03/10 : 21:32:30
Found this in a football fanzine and thought i'd share it with you. And for those of you who like football (soccer to the americans) which best describes your celebration when you score a goal? Also what team do you support?
The Orgasm - No explination is needed.. Simply a time when you loose complete control of your sences, or bladder, or both.
The Group Hugger - Screams incoherently and grabs a few nearest to him, forming a scrum and treating them to some pedigree breath. This bloke has been slagging the scorer off unmercifulkly before the goal, yelling at him to stay wide and to playn it simple. When everyone has calmed down after his 12 yard bicycle kick into the far top corner, he then proceeds to tell you that he's always rated the scorer and how he should get into the box more often.
The Away Fan - bit of a chav and has only come so he can boast to his mates how he gave it the big un at the game. Fresh from a round of pisstaking to the home supporters after standing at the side of the away end looking at the family stand for 90 minutes, someone tells him that his team have scored and its down the steps he goes after some small time no mark has scored from 3 inches and then dives headlong in front of him
Attention All Shipping - A bit of a loner this one, lungs like a pair of bellows, and likes the sound of his own voice. Thinks he has a lot of mates, but those who simply nod in agreement with his every word just want him to shut the **** up. Often heard at big games, speciffically derbies, and screams AAAAAARRRRVVVVVVVVVVVEEEEEEEEEECOOOOOOOOOM when we score. Knob.
The Middle-Aged Long Hauler - He loves his team does this bloke and likes to shoot down in the car for home games. Any goal see's him behaving like something off a space invaders game from 1982, plenty of arm movement, although he finds it harder to move his feet since he's well over 6 ft and he doesnt want to spoil his hush puppies.
Victor Meldrew - We've all sat next to our vic. Sensible anorak and a flat cap becausde his head gets cold. stands there and claps, although he might get a bit more animated if its a derby, because his work mates support the opposition and continually slag off his team. He gives you a withering look as you scream "****ing get in!" but he'll never say anything.
The Executives - Businessmen in suites, You must be careful as you probably have guests from the opposition and we don't want to upset them do we? This is a straight forward applause , no swearing or gestures and it's sit back down as soon as possible. At the end at tight games we must be careful not to shout "WHERE THE **** DID YOU GET 4 ****ING MINUTES FROM!?!?!"
The Quiet Man - Sits there, doesn't say much, but as soon as the ref points back to the center circle its party time. He soon reverts back to quiet mode though because his wife will give him hell if she see's him behaving like that on central soccer night and he's near enough to the front to be picked up on camera.
The Surger - Can't take on board the fact that football is now played in an all seater stadium and no matter what the situation he just has to put his momentum in a downward direction causing scratches and heavy bruising to his shins and a broken neck for the unfortunate people in the row in front.
The Kitten - No matter what the weather, there will always be a female wearing mittens or gloves and dressed up in over a grands worth of clobber from the club shop.
I think i'd have to say that I am 'The Away Fan'. I'm one of those people you love to hate at football matches! And I'm a Stoke supporter!
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tunnelrush
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 United States
1,831 posts Joined: Jun, 2004
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Posted - 2005/03/10 : 21:50:21
You forgot The Mooner:
Always makes it a point to laugh @ his opponents by flashing a bit of bare ass after a goal. A rub-it-in-your-face tactic.

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Nixon
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 United Kingdom
44 posts Joined: Feb, 2005
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Posted - 2005/03/10 : 21:54:02
The Mooner - Always makes it a point to laugh @ his opponents by flashing a bit of bare ass after a goal. A rub-it-in-your-face tactic. Although that person supports Crewe, Port Vale or Cardiff therefor it's the opponents with the last laugh. ;)
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Simon
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 Belgium
5,001 posts Joined: Dec, 2001
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Posted - 2005/03/11 : 07:22:22
quote: Originally posted by Nixon:
The Mooner - Always makes it a point to laugh @ his opponents by flashing a bit of bare ass after a goal. A rub-it-in-your-face tactic. Although that person supports Crewe, Port Vale or Cardiff therefor it's the opponents with the last laugh. ;)
Haha, I'm sure there are more than 3 clubs supporters that might enjoy it! Brighton & Hove Albion for instance! 
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Nixon
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 United Kingdom
44 posts Joined: Feb, 2005
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Posted - 2005/03/11 : 08:20:12
I take it we have a Palace fan?
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Simon
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 Belgium
5,001 posts Joined: Dec, 2001
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Posted - 2005/03/11 : 18:15:15
quote: Originally posted by Nixon:
I take it we have a Palace fan?
Where?
Let's get 'em! 
I'm a 2 football team man, equally divided between my hometown club Wycombe Wanderers, and my boyhood love Tottenham Hotspur.
__________________________________________
"So understand,
Don't waste your time always searching for those wasted years,
Face up...Make your stand,
And realise your living in the golden years!"
__________________________________
"...The Outsider"
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Edited by - Simon on 2005/03/11 18:15:53 |
SixFeet
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 United Kingdom
2,285 posts Joined: Jan, 2005
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Posted - 2005/03/12 : 21:57:03
you forgot the glory supporter
'Emotions touched, With feelings running high, It seems right, No need to run and hide'
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mark-ireland
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 Ireland
1,667 posts Joined: Jan, 2004
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Posted - 2005/03/13 : 15:40:36
haha deadly.
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Nixon
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 United Kingdom
44 posts Joined: Feb, 2005
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Posted - 2005/03/13 : 18:37:24
Glory Supporters - Sits at home on the sofa eating crisps.
Better? 
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alimcpill
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 United Kingdom
271 posts Joined: Jan, 2004
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Posted - 2005/03/13 : 20:27:06
Even though I was in the anfield road end couldn't really see it that well, when mellor fired that screamer past lehmann in the 92nd minute to beat arsenal back in november I think I was a mixture of about 4 of those types!!!
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SixFeet
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 United Kingdom
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Posted - 2005/03/14 : 00:11:54
quote: Originally posted by Nixon:
Glory Supporters - Sits at home on the sofa eating crisps.
Better? 
Hardcore Ravers In The Place, Thats The Way We Kick The Bass, Hardcore Feelin' Hardcore Power, Every Minute Every Hour!
nah i would say it would be more like this
glory supporter - someone than can be found when there team has started on a winning streak or on a roll in the cup, will not know any player by name and only refer to them b their number. will often comment on how he has been a fan of someone for the season:
GS: 'that number 9 has been doing great for us all season'
NS: 'he only signed a fortnight ago'
GS: '................'
p.s alimcpill, i'm an arsenal supporter, shush 
'Emotions touched, With feelings running high, It seems right, No need to run and hide'
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Nixon
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 United Kingdom
44 posts Joined: Feb, 2005
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Posted - 2005/03/14 : 17:11:27
I think I had "An Orgasm" when Stoke scored past Arsenal - especially since we hadn't scored for 4 games since then! Went absolutly balistic! Mental it was. I love to see Arsenal loose, not one of my favourite teams 
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