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Rayovac
Advanced Member
United States
2,049 posts
Joined: Jan, 2008
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 Posted - 2009/01/20 : 02:30:24
Scenario 1:
Jack goes quail hunting before school and then pulls into the school parking lot with his shotgun in his truck's gun rack.
1957 - Vice Principal comes over, looks at Jack's shotgun, goes to his car and gets his shotgun to show Jack.
2007 - School goes into lock down, FBI called, Jack hauled off to jail and never sees his truck or gun again. Counselors called in for traumatized students and teachers.
Scenario 2:
Johnny and Mark get into a fist fight after school.
1957 - Crowd gathers. Mark wins. Johnny and Mark shake hands and end up buddies.
2007 - Police called and SWAT team arrives -- they arrest both Johnny and Mark. They are both charged them with assault and both expelled even though Johnny started it.
Scenario 3:
Jeffrey will not be still in class, he disrupts other students.
1957 - Jeffrey sent to the Principal's office and given a good paddling by the Principal. He then returns to class, sits still and does not disrupt class again.
2007 - Jeffrey is given huge doses of Ritalin. He becomes a zombie. He is then tested for ADD. The school gets extra money from the state because Jeffrey has a disability.
Scenario 4:
Billy breaks a window in his neighbor's car and his Dad gives him a whipping with his belt.
1957 - Billy is more careful next time, grows up normal, goes to college and becomes a successful businessman.
2007 - Billy's dad is arrested for child abuse. Billy is removed to foster care and joins a gang. The state psychologist is told by Billy's sister that she remembers being abused herself and their dad goes to prison. Billy's mom has an affair with the psychologist.
Scenario 5:
Mark gets a headache and takes some aspirin to school.
1957 - Mark shares his aspirin with the Principal out on the smoking dock.
2007 - The police are called and Mark is expelled from school for drug violations. His car is then searched for drugs and weapons.
Scenario 6:
Pedro fails high school English.
1957 - Pedro goes to summer school, passes English and goes to college.
2007 - Pedro's cause is taken up by state. Newspaper articles appear nationally explaining that teaching English as a requirement for graduation is racist. ACLU files class action lawsuit against the state school system and Pedro's English teacher. English is then banned from core curriculum. Pedro is given his diploma anyway but ends up mowing lawns for a living because he cannot speak English.
Scenario 7:
Johnny takes apart leftover firecrackers from the Fourth of July, puts them in a model airplane paint bottle and blows up a red ant bed.
1957 - Ants die.
2007- ATF, Homeland Security and the FBI are all called. Johnny is charged with domestic terrorism. The FBI investi gates his parents -- and all siblings are removed from their home and all computers are confiscated. Johnny's dad is placed on a terror watch list and is never allowed to fly again.
Scenario 8:
Johnny falls while running during recess and scrapes his knee. He is found crying by his teacher, Mary. Mary hugs him to comfort him.
1957 - In a short time, Johnny feels better and goes on playing.
2007 - Mary is accused of being a sexual predator and loses her job. She faces 3 years in State Prison. Johnny undergoes 5 years of therapy.
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Righteous9
Advanced Member
United States
1,516 posts
Joined: Jun, 2004
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Posted - 2009/01/20 : 03:46:52
Yeah, its sad the values... Stronger time, and less unwed children, more married couples, and even approval from parents! Confusing how times have changed...
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Rayovac
Advanced Member
United States
2,049 posts
Joined: Jan, 2008
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Posted - 2009/01/20 : 04:04:56
It's just the fact that we are all so paranoid these days as the result of many tragic events. Reminds me of what Franklin said once. "The man who trades freedom for security does not deserve nor will he ever receive either. "
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jenks
Advanced Member
United Kingdom
3,700 posts
Joined: Feb, 2003
19 hardcore releases
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Posted - 2009/01/20 : 05:56:30
It's hard to take that seriously, as it's so hilariously biased. Best case outcome for 1957, worst case for 2007.
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Rayovac
Advanced Member
United States
2,049 posts
Joined: Jan, 2008
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Posted - 2009/01/20 : 17:45:30
quote:
Originally posted by jenks:
It's hard to take that seriously, as it's so hilariously biased. Best case outcome for 1957, worst case for 2007.
It's supposed to be a joke. 
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Jay-Owen
Advanced Member
Belgium
1,437 posts
Joined: Aug, 2006
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Posted - 2009/01/20 : 20:21:18
I was about to go all crazy at you for saying a whole load of conservative shite.
Then suddenly, I got the joke...
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TheOneNOnly
Advanced Member
United States
1,937 posts
Joined: Oct, 2008
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Posted - 2009/01/20 : 22:29:16
1, 2, 3, 5 has happened in my Niece's school.
Awesome, ain't it?
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Future_Shock
Advanced Member
Australia
2,483 posts
Joined: Apr, 2007
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Posted - 2009/01/21 : 02:26:26
quote:
Originally posted by Jay-Owen:
I was about to go all crazy at you for saying a whole load of conservative shite.
Then suddenly, I got the joke...
hahahaha i felt a similar way. They're a bit ridiculous though...
Scenario 85:
Saurabh is walking to class, Johnny walks past him and says "hi"
1957: Saurabh says hi back.
2007: Undercover operates from the government have been keeping watch on Saurabh because he is from any country from the middle-east, despite the fact he is 16. Swat team invades johnny's house and arrests everyone in the family and they all get taken to prison with life sentences for being involved in terrorism. Then a satellite falls and blows up all of texas. George Bush assumes it was terrorists from the middle-east and declares a total-war economy on his country. Bush ends up blowing up the other side of the world, then in fear every other country attakcs the U.S. and the world explodes.
All because johnny said hi to saurabh.
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