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Excessive
Advanced Member
United Kingdom
584 posts
Joined: Apr, 2004
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 Posted - 2004/05/12 : 20:14:13
I have read all the crap jokes and was slightly amused. How about some decent ones? I will start the ball rolling..........
Q: Whats 3 foot long and keeps a c*nt warm??
A: A man utd scarf!!
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mr bishi
Advanced Member
Ireland
874 posts
Joined: Mar, 2002
49 hardcore releases
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Posted - 2004/05/13 : 02:50:54
quote:
Q: Whats 3 foot long and keeps a c*nt warm??
A: A man utd scarf!!
I that from my bible zoo.
David beckham recently accused victoria of having an affair with michael jackson.But apparently he was in Brooklyn at the time.
"Like a midget at a urinal, I was going to have to stay on my toes. "
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mr bishi
Advanced Member
Ireland
874 posts
Joined: Mar, 2002
49 hardcore releases
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Posted - 2004/05/13 : 03:01:09
Heres a few football jokes
Roy Keane: C*unt
Q...Why does Roy Keane wash his hair in the sink...?
A...Cos that's where your supposed to wash vegetables.
What's the difference between BSE and Roy Keane?
BSE got to Korea.
Mrs keane and Roy were sat in front of the Television (both in her underwear) watching the Six o'clock news. The headline feature was a man who was threatening to jump off the Clifton Suspension Bridge onto the busy road below. Mrs keane turns to Roy and says "Roy, I bet you £5000 that he jumps!" to which Keane replies "5000! Done" The pair shake on it and continue watching the commotion on the TV. Sure enough, the man jumps and hits the road below with a loud thud. Keane takes 5000 out of his pocket and gives it to his wife. "I can't take that from you, Roy" she says. "I was cheating. I saw the five o'clock news so I knew what was going to happen. I can't accept that money". Roy replies "No darling. The money is yours fair and square. I was cheating too, I saw the news at five. I just didn't think he would do it again!!!"
What's the difference between Roy Keane and God?
God doesn't think he is Roy Keane.
A little boy says to his mother: 'Mammy, Mammy, when I grow up I want to be like Roy Keane'
She replies, 'You can't do both, son'.
Rangers jokes:
Q: How many Rangers fans does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Don't matter, cos they're all condemned to eternal darkness anyway
Q: What's do Rangers and a three pin plug have in common?
A: Their both absolutely useless in Europe.
Q: What's the difference between a busload of Rangers fans and a Hedgehog?
A: On a hedgehog, the pricks are on the outside.
"Like a midget at a urinal, I was going to have to stay on my toes. "
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http://www.irishclubbing.net
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Lazerath
Senior Member
United Kingdom
276 posts
Joined: Jan, 2004
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Posted - 2004/05/13 : 11:53:41
semi funny
but football jokes are not what i would call DECENT
Hardcore Forever. True And Thru. Never Let It End.
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--------They've tried to stop us before, but now they've failed.------ ------------------ HARDCORE WILL NEVER DIE!.-----------------
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bigmaddaz
Senior Member
United Kingdom
330 posts
Joined: May, 2004
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 Posted - 2004/05/13 : 12:38:17
My jokes are much better 
who agrees??????
HARDCORE NEVER DIES
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HARDCORE NEVER DIES!!!!!
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Edited by - bigmaddaz on 2004/05/13 12:39:09 |
Excessive
Advanced Member
United Kingdom
584 posts
Joined: Apr, 2004
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Posted - 2004/05/13 : 12:39:22
quote:
Originally posted by bigmaddaz:
My jokes are much better
who agrees??????
HARDCORE NEVER DIES
Show us
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bigmaddaz
Senior Member
United Kingdom
330 posts
Joined: May, 2004
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Posted - 2004/05/13 : 13:23:04
ive put some more jokes on "crap jokes"
HARDCORE NEVER DIES
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Dash
Junior Member
United States
116 posts
Joined: Nov, 2003
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Posted - 2004/05/13 : 20:36:35
Whats the difference between a bitch and a whore?
A whore sleeps with everyone at the party and a bitch sleeps with everyone at theparty except you.
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mark-ireland
Advanced Member
Ireland
1,667 posts
Joined: Jan, 2004
17 hardcore releases
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Posted - 2004/05/13 : 21:47:42
Whats the differecnce between a police car and a hedgehog?
A hedgehogs pricks are on the outside.
mark-ireland
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CriticalTrance
New Member
Australia
44 posts
Joined: Mar, 2004
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Posted - 2004/05/14 : 16:04:08
hehehe not bad
its quite upsetting im probably the shittest joke teller in the world hmm small brain or something? i cant remember one joke anyone ever told me even if it was funny. actually one only that i heard when i was about 13 and its probably totally crap i laughed for a long time.. hmm might have been the fact i was wasted off my tits.. i cant remember how i remember it then.. but i wont tell it long and annoying.. probably like me oops had one too many now?
byiee
this will be compelety embarresing tomorrow
"welcome to my world, do you feel alive? it's all a bad dream spinning in your lonely head"
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SEEKY
Advanced Member
United Kingdom
770 posts
Joined: Jan, 2004
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Posted - 2004/05/14 : 16:44:24
So there I was Tennets in one hand, trousers round my ankles, balls slapping her chin and I thought to myself man what a great beer!
Es , SPEED , TRIPS AND BLOW HERE WE ****ING GO!
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You Heard The Jam And Now Rock It!
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SEEKY
Advanced Member
United Kingdom
770 posts
Joined: Jan, 2004
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Posted - 2004/05/14 : 16:48:52
Scientific studies show 99% of men would like to be a tablecloth it's the only ****ing chance they get of being laid three times a day and pulled of last thing at night!
Es , SPEED , TRIPS AND BLOW HERE WE ****ING GO!
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You Heard The Jam And Now Rock It!
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SEEKY
Advanced Member
United Kingdom
770 posts
Joined: Jan, 2004
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Posted - 2004/05/14 : 16:52:10
THE LIFE OF A PENIS
My hairs a mess, I've only got one eye, My relatives are nuts, My neighbours an ass hole, My best friends a cu nt and my owners a Wanker!!
Es , SPEED , TRIPS AND BLOW HERE WE ****ING GO!
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You Heard The Jam And Now Rock It!
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Edited by - SEEKY on 2004/05/14 16:53:39 |
SEEKY
Advanced Member
United Kingdom
770 posts
Joined: Jan, 2004
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Posted - 2004/05/14 : 16:59:06
Womans standing nude, looks in a bedroom mirror and says to her husband "I look horrible fat and ulgy pay me a compliment", husband replies
"Your eyesight ****ing spot on"
Es , SPEED , TRIPS AND BLOW HERE WE ****ING GO!
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You Heard The Jam And Now Rock It!
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SEEKY
Advanced Member
United Kingdom
770 posts
Joined: Jan, 2004
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Posted - 2004/05/14 : 17:04:08
WHY ARE FEMALES THE STRONGER SEX?
They can produce milk without eating grass, Bleed for a week without dying and bury a 9inch bone quicker than a DOG!!!
Es , SPEED , TRIPS AND BLOW HERE WE ****ING GO!
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You Heard The Jam And Now Rock It!
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SEEKY
Advanced Member
United Kingdom
770 posts
Joined: Jan, 2004
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Posted - 2004/05/14 : 17:09:39
Rebecca Loos has been spotted in a bar drinking beer- apparently you don't have to be posh to swallow Becks!
Es , SPEED , TRIPS AND BLOW HERE WE ****ING GO!
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You Heard The Jam And Now Rock It!
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