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Lilley
Advanced Member
Australia
3,740 posts
Joined: Jul, 2006
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 Posted - 2007/09/30 : 04:27:04
quote:
Originally posted by jenks:
I think I've just found possibly the sickest joke ever:
What's the difference between a baby and an apple?
I DON'T CUM ALL OVER AN APPLE BEFORE I EAT IT.
my mate has a ridiculously large collection of baby jokes. he stopped telling them when his sister miscarriaged. anyway
whats worse than finding 10 babies in one bin?
finding one baby in ten bins
how many babies does it take to paint a house
depends how hard you throw them
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nearly in line....
.....strange continuity problems
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jenks
Advanced Member
United Kingdom
3,698 posts
Joined: Feb, 2003
19 hardcore releases
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Posted - 2007/09/30 : 17:41:27
Yeah I've heard those two, but the first one the way I heard it was:
What's worse than finding a baby nailed to a tree?
Finding a baby nailed to 4 trees.
Let's see what I can remember...
What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ford escort?
I don't a have a ford escort in my garage.
What's worse than a pile of dead babies?
The live on in the middle trying to chew it's way out.
There's one about the bin bag outside of the abortion clinic but I can't remember it...
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kathryn
Advanced Member
United Kingdom
6,520 posts
Joined: Apr, 2005
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Posted - 2007/10/01 : 08:37:46
Now you cant post jokes like that its sick
Abortion isnt a joke and shouldnt be made fun of 
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:)
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kathryn
Advanced Member
United Kingdom
6,520 posts
Joined: Apr, 2005
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Posted - 2007/10/01 : 08:47:22
A little girl asks her mum, "Mum, can I take the dog for a walk
around the block?"
Her mum replies "No, because she is on heat."
Go and ask your dad he's in the garage."
The little girl goes out to the garage and says, "Dad, can I take Lulu for
a walk around the block?
I asked Mum, but she said
the dog was on the heat, and to come ask you."
He took a rag, soaked it in petrol, and scrubbed the dog's
backside with it to disguise the scent, and said
"Ok, you can go now, but keep Lulu on the leash and only go one time
around the block."
The little girl left and returned a few minutes later with no
dog on the leash.
Surprised, Dad asked, "Where's Lulu?"
(You're gonna love this!!!!!!!!!)..............
The little girl said,
"She ran out of petrol about halfway round the block, so another dog is
pushing her home."
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:)
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clarke101
Advanced Member
United Kingdom
3,839 posts
Joined: Jun, 2003
185 hardcore releases
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Posted - 2007/10/01 : 09:52:51
Nothing wrong with sick jokes.
What did the deaf, dumb and blind kid get for Christmas?
Cancer
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Panda Style
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clarke101
Advanced Member
United Kingdom
3,839 posts
Joined: Jun, 2003
185 hardcore releases
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Posted - 2007/10/01 : 10:09:24
Whats the difference between Madeline McCann and Madeline McCann jokes?
Madeline McCann jokes are likely to get old.
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Panda Style
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kathryn
Advanced Member
United Kingdom
6,520 posts
Joined: Apr, 2005
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Posted - 2007/10/01 : 10:35:54
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
There not even remotely funny.
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:)
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Edited by - kathryn on 2007/10/01 10:57:48 |
charlieee
Advanced Member
Australia
1,422 posts
Joined: Dec, 2005
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Posted - 2007/10/01 : 11:12:42
quote:
Originally posted by clarke101:
Nothing wrong with sick jokes.
What did the deaf, dumb and blind kid get for Christmas?
Cancer
bahaha i found that one funni lol
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iv got a purple monkey dishwasher do u?
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ehhhhh
New Member
Australia
26 posts
Joined: Jan, 2007
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Posted - 2007/10/06 : 16:23:12
Sorry if some people take offense to this one, mods delete if inappropriate ;)
I had a bunch of Canadian dollars I needed to exchange, so I went to the currency exchange window at the local bank.
Short line. Just one guy in front of me...an Asian guy who was trying to exchange yen for dollars and he was a little irritated....
He asked the teller, "Why it change?? Yestoday, I get two hunat dolla fo yen. Today I get hunat eighty?? Why it change?"
The teller shrugged his shoulders and said, "Fluctuations".
The Asian guy says, "Fluc you white people too!"
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ehhhhh
New Member
Australia
26 posts
Joined: Jan, 2007
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Posted - 2007/10/06 : 16:24:24
A funeral service is being held in a synagogue for a woman who has just passed away. At the end of the service the pallbearers are carrying the casket out, when they accidentally bump into a wall, jarring the casket.
They hear a faint moan. They open the casket and find that the woman is actually alive.
She lives for ten more years and then dies. A ceremony is again held at the same synagogue and at the end of the ceremony the pallbearers are again carrying the casket.
As they are walking out, the husband cries, "Watch out for the wall!"
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ehhhhh
New Member
Australia
26 posts
Joined: Jan, 2007
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Posted - 2007/10/06 : 16:25:59
A young executive was leaving the office late one evening when he found
the CEO standing in front of a shredder with a piece of paper in his hand.
"Listen," said the CEO, "this is a very sensitive and important document here,
and my secretary has gone for the night. Can you make this thing work?"
"Certainly," said the young executive. He turned the machine on, inserted the
paper, and pressed the start button. "Excellent, excellent!" said the CEO as his
paper disappeared inside the machine. "I just need one copy."
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ehhhhh
New Member
Australia
26 posts
Joined: Jan, 2007
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Posted - 2007/10/06 : 16:28:29
Superman is flying high in the sky above the Justice League building.
He looks down and sees Wonder Woman sunbaking in the nude.
He thinks to himself, "Mmmmm.... I would love to get it on with Wonder Woman...she is hot."
He decides that as he is faster than a speeding bullet, he could fly down, get it on with her, and fly away faster than she could open her eyes...so she would never know.
So he goes into a steep dive.....pop...pop...pop....and flies away.
Wonder Woman opens her eyes and says, "What the heck was that??"
The Invisible Man says, "No idea, but my bottom hurts a lot now".
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charlieee
Advanced Member
Australia
1,422 posts
Joined: Dec, 2005
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Posted - 2007/10/07 : 12:22:01
quote:
Originally posted by ehhhhh:
Superman is flying high in the sky above the Justice League building.
He looks down and sees Wonder Woman sunbaking in the nude.
He thinks to himself, "Mmmmm.... I would love to get it on with Wonder Woman...she is hot."
He decides that as he is faster than a speeding bullet, he could fly down, get it on with her, and fly away faster than she could open her eyes...so she would never know.
So he goes into a steep dive.....pop...pop...pop....and flies away.
Wonder Woman opens her eyes and says, "What the heck was that??"
The Invisible Man says, "No idea, but my bottom hurts a lot now".
bahaha gud 1
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iv got a purple monkey dishwasher do u?
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SPOOX
Advanced Member
United Kingdom
2,644 posts
Joined: Jul, 2006
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Posted - 2007/10/07 : 13:36:11
   
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