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BoneIDOL
New Member
United Kingdom
73 posts
Joined: Nov, 2005
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 Posted - 2005/11/11 : 02:10:02
a man bought a bull from a local man. He was having trouble getting the bull to breed so he asked the man he bought it from. The man said "just stick your fingers into the cows vagina and rub it on the bulls nose, he will get hard immediately." Ok, so he goes home and tries it, sure enough the bull goes wild and scrumps the shit out of the cow. That night the man is laying in bed and thinks that he might get his dick up if he tried the same trick with his wife. So when shes sleeping he reaches over and sticks his fingers in her vagina, he rubs them under his nose and sure enough, here comes his hard on. So he wakes her up and says " Honey, look!" She rolls over and says "Big deal, you got a bloody nose."
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http://www.reverbnation.com/boneidol
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Dj DontStop
Senior Member
Canada
273 posts
Joined: Nov, 2005
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Posted - 2005/11/11 : 02:15:59
its one of those HAHAHA, ewwwwww jokes :D g/j
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I Am An Addict, And The Music Is My Addiction...
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1up
Advanced Member
Australia
1,091 posts
Joined: Jan, 2005
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Posted - 2005/11/11 : 07:55:54
thats funny and dirty
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fcuk the rails. fcuk the rails! FCUK THE RAILS!
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Evel
Advanced Member
United Kingdom
604 posts
Joined: Jul, 2005
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Posted - 2005/11/11 : 09:28:35
Thats Rank LOL
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As from 14.3.06 Evel became Smoogie as he got bored with being Evel.
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dj_excy
Advanced Member
United Kingdom
2,004 posts
Joined: Jun, 2004
205 hardcore releases
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Posted - 2005/11/11 : 12:08:24
lol nice1
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Jon O-T
Advanced Member
United Kingdom
929 posts
Joined: Jun, 2005
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Posted - 2005/11/11 : 15:36:32
LOL / ewww / 
Ok heres one,
3 couples die and go to heaven. They all meet god at heavens gate, to see if they are allowd through. The first couple ask god if they are acepted. God says to the husband "I'm sorry but you can't go through, because you let money take over your life. You even married a woman named Penny" So the first couple walk away. Then the 2nd couple approach god, he says to the husband "I'm sorry, you can't go through iether, because you let alcohol take over your life. You even married a woman named Cherry. (not the friut cherry the drink)" As the second couple are leaving, the third husbang says to his wife "Come on Fanny, he's not going to let us in iether. 
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The internet: Where men are men, women are men, and children are FBI agents 
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bigmaddaz
Senior Member
United Kingdom
330 posts
Joined: May, 2004
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Posted - 2005/11/11 : 15:43:24
i got 1
As an ultimate test of his will power, a man decided to give up sex for Lent. Although not thrilled with the idea, his wife agreed to support him in this effort. The first few weeks weren't too difficult. Things got tougher during the next couple of weeks, so the wife wore her dowdiest night clothes and chewed on garlic before going to bed. The last couple of weeks were extremely tough on the husband, so the wife took to locking the bedroom door and forcing the husband to sleep on the couch.
Easter morning finally came. A knock came on the wife's bedroom door.
"KNOCK!!! KNOCK!!! KNOCK!!!"
Husband: "Guess who?"
Wife: "I know who it is!"
Husband: "Guess what I want?"
Wife: "I know what you want!"
Husband: "Guess what I'm knockin' with?"
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HARDCORE NEVER DIES!!!!!
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Jon O-T
Advanced Member
United Kingdom
929 posts
Joined: Jun, 2005
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Posted - 2005/11/11 : 16:00:57
Ha ha! bigmaddaz, I havn't seen any of your posts since the last jokes topic :)
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The internet: Where men are men, women are men, and children are FBI agents
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shent19
New Member
United Kingdom
39 posts
Joined: Oct, 2005
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Posted - 2005/11/11 : 16:45:25
a mate told me this one the other day so don't blame me!
A man walks into a zoo and there was only a dog there..................................................................................................................it was a chitzu
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Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy
http://www.megaupload.com/?d=3VGMWD6Q <--- My latest mix :o)
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-Bazza-
Advanced Member
United Kingdom
1,276 posts
Joined: Oct, 2004
18 hardcore releases
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Posted - 2005/11/11 : 20:47:32
quote:
Originally posted by shent19:
a mate told me this one the other day so don't blame me!
A man walks into a zoo and there was only a dog there..................................................................................................................it was a chitzu
The one-liners are usually the best. 
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KID_PIRAHNA
Senior Member
United States
275 posts
Joined: Aug, 2003
87 hardcore releases
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Posted - 2005/11/12 : 15:17:33
What did one say tampon to the other tampon???
NOTHING.....they were stuck-up b!tch3s.
     
thank you, thank you... i'll be here all week... be sure to tip your waitress
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shent19
New Member
United Kingdom
39 posts
Joined: Oct, 2005
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Posted - 2005/11/12 : 16:02:05
2 muffins were cooking in the oven. One turns to the other and says 'christ, its hot in here!'
The other replies '**** me! A talking muffin!'
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Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy
http://www.megaupload.com/?d=3VGMWD6Q <--- My latest mix :o)
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